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Bees/correction

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Bees/correction
Message de scoubidoo71 posté le 04-09-2019 à 17:00:53 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
Est-ce que quelqu'un aurait la gentillesse de me corriger ?
Merci d'avance.

Bees are really our friends. Bees are vital to reproduction of vegetal species, these ones which take care of pollination.
Moreover products of hive are very good for health : royal gelly, glue bee and pollen are really wealth of nature.

There are two pollens : fresh pollen and ball pollen. The first is more expensive than the second but he is also more effective. Each pollen has a specific feature pollen of cistus protects mucous membrane of intestine. It used also in the case of persistent tiredness.

Bees have got a thrilling life. The most experienced bees go off to reconnoitre and show to remainder of colony by way of dance the distance and the direction where they can find the nectar an pollen of flowers necessary to products honey. Bees need diet rich in proteins what explain the significance of floral diversity.

It would be wonderful that every beekeeper accepts to pick up a small amount honey on condition that the weather forecast is allowed. Honey isn't picked up during heatwave or rainy spring.
If we don't pick up all the honey, honey will be eaten by bees in order to have energy and warm themselves.

If beekeeper pick up all the honey they will substitute it for sugar otherwise there is a chance that bees would starve to death. What is terrible is the sugar weaken bees'immune system.
If sugar is bad for man it will also be bad for bees.
If from time to time we desire to do a gesture for the environment we can have autonomous hive in other words without pick up of honey or we can plant a small natural meadow what is the easiest solution.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 04-09-2019 21:25


Réponse : Bees/correction de gerondif, postée le 05-09-2019 à 00:07:23 (S | E)
Bonjour
vous mélangez for et to, oubliez des the et des a . Mettez des virgules et des points, sinon, les phrases perdent leur sens.
erreurs en bleu

Bees are really our friends. Bees are vital to(for the) reproduction of vegetal species, these ones(they are the ones that) which take care of pollination.
Moreover products of hive(hive products) are very good for (your)health : royal gelly(jelly), glue bee(??) and pollen are really wealth treasures of nature.

There are two (types of) pollen : fresh pollen and ball pollen. The first is more expensive than the second but he(neutre) is also more effective. Each pollen has a specific feature : pollen of cistus(?? citrus ?) protects the mucous membrane of the intestine. It is used also in the case of persistent tiredness.

Bees have got a thrilling life. The most experienced bees go off to reconnoitre and show to the remainder of the colony by way of dance the distance and the direction where they can find the nectar and pollen of flowers necessary to products(produire, produce, pas des produits, products) honey. Bees need a diet rich in proteins what(ce qui explique, placé derrière une virgule, serait which explains the significance of floral diversity.

It would be wonderful that(if) every beekeeper accepts(prétérit) to pick up (je mettrais plutôt collect, to pick up fait penser au verbe récolter des fruits sur des arbres...) a small amount of honey on condition that the weather forecast is allowed.(pas clair ! à condition que le bulletin météo soit autorisé. Si le temps le permet peut se dire de façon très courte : weather permitting) Honey isn't picked up during heatwaves or a rainy spring.
If we don't pick up all the honey, honey will be eaten by bees in order to have energy and warm themselves (to keep warm. pas besoin du themselves).

If beekeepers pick up all the honey, they will substitute it for(c'est dans l'autre sens ! they should replace it with sugar) sugar otherwise there is a chance that bees would(will) starve to death. What is terrible is that the sugar weakens bees'immune system.
If sugar is bad for man, it will also be bad for bees.
If from time to time we desire to do a gesture for the environment, we can have autonomous hives in other words without pick up of honey(maladroit) or we can plant a small natural meadow what(virgule + which) is the easiest solution.




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