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Oral/ New York

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais : Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Oral/ New York
Message de palomalchy posté le 13-05-2020 à 11:39:01 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
j'ai besoin d'une correction sur ce sujet pour demain soir ....
pouvez-vous m'aider à corriger les fautes?
Merci pour vos réponses.

thème : New York, ville mondiale
What is the place of social diversity in New York ?

I’m going to talk about this document, this document is a raport of the “role of immigrants in the New York city economy” in 2016. With this text we can discovered the place of immigrants in the economy of the city. Here the city in question is New York. We have a lot of idea about the city of New York and we know the fact that this city welcomes thousands of migrants. But we can therefore ask ourselves:
What impact these migrants have on the city’s economy but above all on social diversity?

In fact New York is a big city with a lot of inhabitants and in this inhabitant we can find a lot of immigrants. These immigrants have a significant impact on the city’s diversity and on the social diversity. A social diversity is defined as a successful community which includes individuals from diverse backgrounds who all contribute to the success of the community by practicing understanding and respect of different ideas and perspectives.
In this document we talk a lot about the impact of immigrants but more on the economic side. We can see their impact on the city’s economy with for example this passage of the text “New York City’s immigrants continue to play an important role in the City’s economy”, what they bring to the city for example because a lot of immigrants are entrepreneurs or also because “nearly on-fifth of the Fortune 500 companies had been founded by immigrants.” and the different benefits that immigrants bring to their arrival in New York.
This text evoked a lot of economic side but at the end we talk also about the impact of the immigrants but on the cultural side or on the ethnic diversity.
So we can say that the purpose of this document is to illustrate the fact that the city of New York has not built itself and that migrants are very important in the success of this city.
To return to social diversity we can say that New York is a city with a lot of social diversity and the place of immigrants show it even more. The place of social diversity in New York can also be seen through the different progress that the people of New York make for the development of the city and the social diversity is much based on this criterion: the development and contribution of the success of my city.
Without the diversity of the people New York would surely not be the city of New York as we know it. This diversity allows New York a city, an advanced economy but also a good development because this diversity of people allows many cultures within the same city. These immigrants have an important place within the city because as the text tells they are at the origin of several very important things in New York they are responsible for its development from day to day.
To conclude we can say that New York is a city with a lot of social diversity because we have seen the economic side but it is not the only side where we see the social diversity of New York because the social diversity can be find in the cultural side. This diversity is important because it makes New York the city it is today: a globality, international city, known all over the world ....This city provides a broad cultural choice, investments of all kinds can be made due to this social diversity. So we can say the social diversity has an important place in the city of New York.


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Modifié par lucile83 le 13-05-2020 11:54
Gris



Réponse : Oral/ New York de laure95, postée le 13-05-2020 à 18:33:06 (S | E)
Bonsoir,
-a raport: ?
- we can discovered: can + infinitif.
- a lot of idea: pluriel.
- But we can therefore ask ourselves:chercher le verbe "se demander"
- What impact these migrants have on the city’s economy but above all on social diversity?: revoir structure d'une question

- in this inhabitant: ?
- we (qui est we?) talk a lot about the impact of immigrants
- immigrants bring to (pas la bonne préposition) their arrival in New York.
- This text evoked (présent) a lot of (article) economic side
- we talk also
- and that migrants are (passé)very important in the success of this city.
- the place of immigrants show it even more: faute de conjugaison.
- of my city: ?
- Without the diversity of the (pas de the devant people) people
- This diversity allows New York (il manque des mots)a city,
- as the text tells: un texte ne parle pas.
- where we (can) see the social diversity of New York
- because the social diversity can be find: can + be + participe passé.
- because it makes (present perfect)New York the city it is today:
- a globality: ?




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