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Energie renouvelable (correction) (1)

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Energie renouvelable (correction)
Message de esmax666 posté le 13-06-2008 à 23:50:14 (S | E | F)

Hello

J'ai réalisé ma dernière discussion et j'aurais aimé avoir une correction car je passe mon oral jeudi
Pourriez vous corrigez ma partie c'est important pour moi
XXX<- réponse de l'autre personne

Merci beaucoup

On doit discuter des gents pétroliers dire si ils font quelques chose pour l'environnement et leur futurs


-----

Moi:In fact, I disagree with Caroline Lucas. To my mind, shell and bp are really involved with the environmental project in order to have a good self-image. Moreover, if they lie, I guess that it can be very bad for her…

And you, what is your opinion?
XXXX
why do think that they participated to reduce the CO2?

MOI:In fact, they created the Shell Eco-marathon, it’s was the 22 may this year. The main goal is to improve the fuel efficiency and lower the emissions output of today's cars. In 2006, Shell was rewarded for their innovative challenge geared(equipé de vitesse) towards encouraging youngsters to learn more about the energy industry through practical and fun projects. This year, the First price was win by a French School with a autonomy of about 2000km (on) for the equivalent of a single litre of fuel. In 2005, a hydrogen-powered vehicle built by Swiss has traveled about 4000 km. This is the equivalent of driving from Paris to Moscow!

Did you know that?
XXXXXX
Do you know other methods to reduce pollution?

MOI:Yes, they try to have the cleanest fuels in order to reduce the CO2 impact. They produce new sort of motor oils and fuel additive which allow to reduce our energy-consuming.

Question que je te pose
XXX
XXX
tu enchaines en disant qu’il ne dépense rien en posant une question what do you thing

MOI:To my mind, it’s false that actually they don’t invest money for renewable energy, they have created a new group, in 1997, called “Shell Renewables”. It develops commercial opportunities in Solar energy and Wind energy. About $1 billion was invested since 2000, they have some Hydrogen filling stations in five countries. That’s shows that shell seems to be concerned by this problem.
BP created a program called “targetneutral”, if we buy essence in her station they will contribute up to some money to this program. And the money is planned to develop renewable energy.

Quel question je te pose ?
XXXX
Tu parles que finalement il s’interresse pas au solar kil abondonne…

MOI:I don’t think that they are losing interest in solar energy because it is abundant, local and emission-free. But the current costs of turning sunlight into electricity remain too high for large-scale use (utilisation à grande échelle) because the most widely (largement) applied technology uses silicon and a highly complex manufacturing process. After many years making solar panels in this way, Shell has ceased its activities with this kind of panels in order to moving straight (diretement) into the next generation “CIS” thin-film technology. Indeed, the production process is less complicated and there isn’t usage of expensive silicon.

XXX puis tu enchaine sur l’éolienne…
What do you think about wind…

MOI:I guess that the maintenance was too expensive… that’s why it was pulled out. Furthermore, I just would like to add that Shell WindEnergy has become a major investor in wind. They said that generating emission-free electricity that saves around 1 million tons of CO2 a year compared to emissions from a coal-fired plant.
Currently, Shell has equity (action) in 11 wind projects with a total capacity of around 1,100 megawatts (Shell share is about 550 megawatts). 845 megawatts are in operation and more than 260 megawatts under construction.

XXXX
XXXX

MOI:I just would like to add that Shell is a leader in developing GTL technology. GTL is the conversion of natural gas into clean liquid fuel. It is an attractive option to commercialize abundant gas reserves. The Shell Group has almost 30 years of experience in developing and using coal gasification

-------------------
Modifié par esmax666 le 13-06-2008 23:52


Réponse: Energie renouvelable (correction) de esmax666, postée le 13-06-2008 à 23:50:49 (S | E)
XXXX
Do you want to add something?

MOI:To sum up, I would like to say that if fossil fuels still contribute in large part to global growth, modern renewable energies should cover between 5 and 10% of energy needs in 2025 and between 30 and 50% of these needs in 2050. Indeed, every years, people asks more and more energy and fossil fuels are limited that’s why shell and bp haven’t choice and must turn to the renewable energy.

The best is to have a car as we can see on the movie “Back to the future”. You can drive and fly with a car powered by bananas skill. But the more realistic were, to my mind, the electric there is 2 problem, the battery haven’t not enough autonomy and we don’t know well recycle it.




Réponse: Energie renouvelable (correction) de joey93, postée le 14-06-2008 à 14:07:55 (S | E)
they created...on May 22nd of this year. (it is was, n'existe pas)
and funny projects.
was won (revois la voix passive)
....by Swiss traveled (le passé composé en français ne se traduit pas forcément pas un présent perfect, revois les temps grâce aux fiches sur le site)
évite la répétition de "to my mind" que tu as déjà employé un peu plus haut, tu peux dire : I think/ reckon, from my point of view, there is no denying = il n'y a pas de doute que..., varie les expressions
"actually" siginifie "en réalité", je ne suis pas sûre que c'est ce que tu veuilles dire, s'il s'agit "d'actuellement" cela se dit "currently"
in 1997 = passé, donc emploi du prétérit "they created"
it shows how much Shell seems to be concerned with this problem.
remainS (oublier le "s" de la 3ème personne coûte de nombreux points!!)
Shell ceased...in order to move
people ask
Shell... don't have the choice..
Je ne comprend pas ce que tu veux dire par "But the more realistic...the electric there is 2 problemS"
the battery doesn't have enough autonomy and we don't know yet how to recycle it.
En espérant t'avoir aidé, Joey.




Réponse: Energie renouvelable (correction) de esmax666, postée le 15-06-2008 à 21:56:28 (S | E)
merci pour ton aide je vais corriger ca
Pour la dernière phrase j'ai essaye de la corrigé dans ma dernière version, je voudrais parler des voiture électrique qui n'ont pas assez d'autonomie et un problème de recyclage

------------


In fact, I disagree with Caroline Lucas. To my mind, shell and bp are really involved with the environmental project in order to have a good self-image. Moreover, if they lie, I guess that it can be very bad for her…
And you, what is your opinion?

XXXX
why do think that they participated to reduce the CO2?

In fact, they created the Shell Eco-marathon, it was the 22 may this year. The main goal is to improve the fuel efficiency and lower the emissions output of today's cars. In 2006, Shell was rewarded for their innovative challenge geared(equipé de vitesse) towards encouraging youngsters to learn more about the energy industry through practical and funny projects. This year, the First price was wun by a French School with a autonomy of about 2000km for the equivalent of a single litre of fuel. In 2005, a hydrogen-powered vehicle built by Swiss traveled about 4000 km. This is the equivalent of driving from Paris to Moscow!
Did you know that?

XXXXXX
Do you know other methods to reduce pollution?

Yes, they try to have the cleanest fuels in order to reduce the CO2 impact. They produce new sort of motor oils and fuel additive which allow to reduce our energy-consuming.

Question que je te pose
XXX
XXX


From my point of view, it’s false that currently they don’t invest money for renewable energy, they created a new group, in 1997, called “Shell Renewables”. It develops commercial opportunities in Solar energy and Wind energy. About $1 billion was invested since 2000, they have some Hydrogen filling stations in five countries. It shows how much Shell seems to be concerned with this problem.
BP created a program called “targetneutral”, if we buy essence in her station they will contribute up to some money to this program. And the money is planned to develop renewable energy.

Quel question je te pose ?
XXXX


I don’t think that they are losing interest in solar energy because it is abundant, local and emission-free. But the current costs of turning sunlight into electricity remains too high for large-scale use (utilisation à grande échelle) because the most widely (largement) applied technology uses silicon and a highly complex manufacturing process. After many years making solar panels in this way, Shell ceased its activities with this kind of panels in order to move straight (diretement) into the next generation “CIS” thin-film technology. Indeed, the production process is less complicated and there isn’t usage of expensive silicon.

XXX puis tu enchaine sur l’éolienne…
What do you think about wind…

I guess that the maintenance was too expensive… that’s why it was pulled out. Furthermore, I just would like to add that Shell WindEnergy has become a major investor in wind. They said that generating emission-free electricity that saves around 1 million tons of CO2 a year compared to emissions from a coal-fired plant.
Currently, Shell has equity (action) in 11 wind projects with a total capacity of around 1,100 megawatts (Shell share is about 550 megawatts). 845 megawatts are in operation and more than 260 megawatts under construction.

XXXX
XXXX

I just would like to add that Shell is a leader in developing GTL technology. GTL is the conversion of natural gas into clean liquid fuel. It is an attractive option to commercialize abundant gas reserves. The Shell Group has almost 30 years of experience in developing and using coal gasification

Do you want to add something?

To sum up, I would like to say that if fossil fuels still contribute in large part to global growth, modern renewable energies should cover between 5 and 10% of energy needs in 2025 and between 30 and 50% of these needs in 2050. Indeed, every years, people ask more and more energy and fossil fuels are limited that’s why shell and bp don’t have the choice and must turn to the renewable energy.

The best is to have a car as we can see on the movie “Back to the future”. You can drive and fly with a car powered by bananas skill. But the more realistic were, to my mind, the electric car but there is 2 problem, the battery don’t have enough autonomy and we don’t know well recycle it.




Réponse: Energie renouvelable (correction) de laure95, postée le 16-06-2008 à 17:30:55 (S | E)
Bonjour. Voici mes commentaires.
- involved in et non involved with.
- can be: attention, tu utilises une subordonnée en if, donc tu dois mettre du futur dans cette partie de la phrase.
- it was the 22 may this year: enlève it was et this year, met "on" devant the et donc ça ne te fait plus qu'une phrase au lieu de 2.
- the emissions output of today's cars: fais une subordonnée.
- il manque pas un mot après "geared"?.
- towards: ?, purquoi encourage en -ing?
- wun: faute en écrivant?
- a autonomy: "a" devant un mot commençant par une consonne.
- traveled me gêne: c'est plutôt pour une personne.
- about $1 million was invested since 2000: pas de voix passive au prétérit avec SINCE!!
- BP created: utilise le présent perfect.
- usage: mot français.
- 2 fois "I just would like to add".
- every years
- on the movie: in the movie
- the more realistic: ce n'est pas comme ça qu'on fait du superlatif.
- were: was!!!
- there is 2 problems.
- the battery don't: 3è personne du singulier!!!
- we don't know well recycle it: well: pas à la bonne place. "to" devant recycle.


Réponse: Energie renouvelable (correction) de esmax666, postée le 16-06-2008 à 21:26:02 (S | E)
Ben la phrase vient directement du site de shell...

il manque pas un mot après "geared"?. tu pense qu'il faut la simplifier?
Lien Internet


sinon ensuiteje dois dire
and reduce emissions from current cars.?


traveled, je remplace par rided? mais c'est plutôt pour un vélo non?

about $1 million was invested since 2000
About $1 billion was invested in 8 years

usage: mot français.
C'est une phrase que j'ai vu sur le site anglais de shell, et je l'avais trouvé dans le dico, tu aurais mis quoi comme definition ?


we don't know well recycle it: well: pas à la bonne place. "to" devant recycle.
and we don’t know to recycle it well.
comme ca?

-------------------
Modifié par esmax666 le 16-06-2008 22:02


Réponse: Energie renouvelable (correction) de laure95, postée le 17-06-2008 à 18:40:06 (S | E)
OK pour "usage", je ne le connaissais pas, désolé!
"About $1 million has been invested since 2000 (présent perfecr avec since)".
Tu peux remplacer "travelled" par "covered", mais je ne suis pas sure de moi. Mais, travel fais bizarre avec car comme sujet.Pour ta phrase avec "geared", je te fais confiance. Et la dernière correction avec "well" est bonne. As-tu corrigé aussi les autres erreurs. Peux-tu m'envoyer ton texte corrigé?


Réponse: Energie renouvelable (correction) de esmax666, postée le 17-06-2008 à 19:03:56 (S | E)
euh ben j'ai pas ton adresse mail

Ici j'aimerais simplifier car j'arrive pas a retenir la fin... je la trouve assez compliqué

But the current costs of turning sunlight into electricity remains too high for large-scale use (utilisation à grande échelle) because the most widely (largement) applied technology uses silicon and a highly complex manufacturing process. After many years making solar panels in this way, Shell ceased its activities with this kind of panels in order to move straight (diretement) into the next generation “CIS” thin-film technology.

par

But the current costs of turning sunlight into electricity remains too high for large-scale use because the most widely panels uses silicon and a highly complex manufacturing process. Thats why, Shell ceased its activities with this kind of panels in order to move straight into the next generation “CIS” thin-film technology.



a Ton avis comment dit on shell en anglais?




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