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Foreign country and gap year

<< Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Foreign country and gap year
Message de folk posté le 30-10-2010 à 22:29:37 (S | E | F)
Bonjour , pouvez-vous s'il vous plaît me dire si ce texte est bon?
Merci beaucoup.

You have just spent a gap year in a foreign country . write about your experience.


Going abroad for a year was just what i wanted to do. I was 16 at the time . I thought of leaving London to change mY way of living. I went to Barcelona to a host family. Mr ...and Mrs... had a daughter , her name was Carolina . She was bilingual. I learnt Spanish Because I went to her school. Her school was different from mine .Thanks to Carolina i was able to speak with her friends. With them I had also travelled during one year in a foreign country. Carolina's house was A welcoming home I learnt their tradition , they don't eat at the same moment as we do. Every evening I went strolling in town with Carolina, there were a lot pf people they like singing and eating tapas. On the whole , i had a fantastic time , it was very enriching cultures i liked the contact of the Spanish . For me i find that it is a good experience to travel in another country , What impressed me is their cooking , it is delicious. I'm convinced everyone should live in a different part of the world for a few months.

Merci.

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Modifié par lucile83 le 30-10-2010 22:37




Réponse: Foreign country and gap year de sheepishly, postée le 31-10-2010 à 16:40:44 (S | E)
Hello !

As noone answers your request,I will try and correct your essay.


Going abroad [During...] for a year was just [exactly ?!] what i MAJUSCULE !! wanted to do. I was 16 at the time . I thought of leaving [Want to...] London to change [gérondif] my way of living [Base verbale.]. I went to Barcelona in a host family. Mr ...and Mrs... had a daughter , her name was Carolina . She was bilingual. I learnt [ou learned ] Spanish because I went to her school. Her school was different from mine .Thanks to Carolina i was able to speak with her friends. With them I had also travelled during one year in a foreign country. Carolina's house was a welcoming home. I learnt their tradition , they don't eat at the same moment [time] as we do. Every evening I went strolling in town [downtown ] with Carolina, there were [was*] a lot of people. They like singing and eating tapas. On the whole , i had a fantastic time , it was very enriching cultures. i liked the contact of the Spanish [lourd... Utilise le génitif de possession]. For me, i find [find est littéral... Utilise think] that it is a good experience to travel in another country. What impressed me is their cooking , it is delicious. I'm convinced everyone should live in a different part of the world for a few months.

Some remarks comments :
-'I' is written with a capital letter !! That's very important !!
-Blue : repetition (so, try to make it more readable !)
-Red : uncorrect
-Green : would be better if you'd follow this councils my advice !

Good luck with your pretty good English !

* Lien Internet


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Modifié par lucile83 le 31-10-2010 16:45





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