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Correction /oral fac

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction /oral fac
Message de rom27 posté le 09-05-2011 à 23:31:08 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,

Bien demain j'ai un oral, n'ayant pu aller aux cours car je travaille, j'ai fait avec les bribes de cours que j'ai récupérées et bien entendu, l'aide de ce merveilleux site. J'ai mis des "X" pour des noms trop révélateurs mais vous allez quand même apprendre bien des choses sur ma vie!
toute correction est la bienvenue jusqu'à demain 15h^^. Je vous préviens il peut y avoir de grosses et terribles fautes...

Good afternoon, nice to meet you, I don’t think we have met so, let me introduce my self.
I am X, I’m Xyears old and I’m french. I come from X, I live in a house with my parents in a little village called X. My mother is secretary and my father is agency supervisor. I have an old brother, he’s X years old and he studies at IUFM (a teacher training college).
X is a little village, nice and quiet. This village is in the middle of beet’s fields near X and approximately to 20 minutes of X by bus. There are some stores, one barely, a grocer’s shop and two haidrdressers. So there are also a nursey school and a primary school and a doctor. For the tourists our village has a little war memorial and an old church which was built in twelfth century.
My hobbies are going out with friends, read comic strips and listen to music and sometimes, playing video games. I don’t do any sport this years but I swam for 5 years.I am member of a comic strip club since 10 years. I draw a BD about the ancient Egypt because I like particularly this period of the history. I play guitar for 7 years and I have already played in group for a marriage and a party at high school.
Concerning my studies, I went to the lycee JDA in X for my secondary education and I passed the baccalaureat specialized in arts.
In 2008 I enrolled at the university of X in sociology. It really has me to interesser but I wanted to find a license (Bachelor's degree) which gives me more opportunity.
So, in 2009 I began a double programme,(double cursus?) sociology and AES the french equivalent of a bachelor's degree in economics and social science. Today I am In the second year of AES and the third year of sociology. Both are interesting but I prefer sociology. In sociology it’s more a work of reflection and personal researches than AES. Aes is mainly learning and nothing else (apprendre par coeur?).


At the end of this years, if all passes well, I am going to have a license and I postulate for a Master's degree the next year.
It’s Master's degree management of the social and the united economy in IUP management of the social and the health. This department depends on sciences of man( sciences de l’homme?) and iae. Should it use to find a job in the management of associations, it’s a sector in which I wish to work later.
It’s an admisson on record, and if I’m not qualify I am going to continue in the third year of AES.
And if I am not really lucky, if I’m not qualify and I haven’t completed half of one license, I think I will continue AJAC in AES or repeat. So, the first half of the year to work in a foreign country. Where? I don’t know, maybe in England, it would be the opportunity(occasion) to improve my english. I had only past one week in england.
This summer, for jully, I am going to work to a community centre in giberville, as many summers. Maybe in august i should go in Italia with my family but it’s not sure.


Voilà ,je vous remercie d'avance pour votre aide et votre bonne volonté!

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 10-05-2011 06:49


Réponse: Correction /oral fac de notrepere, postée le 10-05-2011 à 01:52:23 (S | E)
Hello, très bien; peu de fautes.

Good afternoon, nice to meet you, I don’t think we have met so, let me introduce myself.
I am X, I’m Xyears old and I’m French. I come from X, I live in a house with my parents in a little village called X. My mother is a secretary and my father is an agency supervisor. I have an old brother, he’s X years old and he studies at IUFM (a teacher training college).
X is a little village, nice and quiet. This village is in the middle of beet’s a beet field near X and approximately to 20 minutes of from X by bus. There are some stores, one barely, a grocer’s shop and two haidrdressers. So there are (singular) also a nursey (orthographe) school and a primary school and a doctor. For the tourists our village has a little war memorial and an old church which was built in twelfth century.
My hobbies are going out with friends, reading comic strips and listening to music and sometimes, playing video games. I don’t (au passé) do any sport this years but I swam for 5 years.I am (present perfect) a member of a comic strip club since for 10 years. I draw (passé) a BD about the ancient Egypt because I like particularly like this period of the history. I play (present perfect continuous) guitar for 7 years and I have already played in group for a marriage and a party at high school.
Concerning my studies, I went to the lycee JDA in X for my secondary education and I passed the baccalaureat specialized specializing in arts.
In 2008 I enrolled at the university of X in sociology. It really has me to interesserinterests me but I wanted to find a license (Bachelor's degree) which gives me more opportunity.
So, in 2009 I began a double programme,(double cursus?) degree in sociology and AES the french equivalent of a bachelor's degree in economics and social science. Today I am In the second year of AES and the third year of sociology. Both are interesting but I prefer sociology. In sociology it’s more a work of reflection and personal researches than AES. Aes is mainly learning memorization and nothing else (apprendre par coeur?).


-------------------
Modifié par notrepere le 10-05-2011 21:37





Réponse: Correction /oral fac de rom27, postée le 10-05-2011 à 10:52:55 (S | E)
Merci pour la correction.
Pour corriger mes fautes:
So there are (singular) also a nursey (accorde): so there is also a nursey school and...
I draw (passé) a BD: i drew a BD
I play (present perfect continuous) guitar for 7 years : i have been playing guitar for...

Personne pour corriger le dernier paragraphe?

-------------------
Modifié par rom27 le 10-05-2011 11:05





Réponse: Correction /oral fac de notrepere, postée le 10-05-2011 à 21:54:11 (S | E)
Hello

Désolé, j'ai fait une bêtise!

J'ai voulu dire: nursey (orthographe)

At the end of this years, if all passes (1) well, I am going to have a license and I postulate (2) for a Master's degree the next year.
It’s Master's degree management of the social and the united economy in IUP management of the social and the health. (3) This department depends on sciences of man( sciences de l’homme?) and iae . Should it (4) use to find a job in the management of associations, it’s a sector in which I wish to work later.
It’s an admisson on record , and if I’m not qualified I am going to continue in the third year of AES.
And if I am not really lucky, if I’m not qualified and I haven’t completed half of one license, I think I will continue AJAC in AES or repeat. So, the first half of the year to (5) work in a foreign country. Where? I don’t know, maybe in England, it would be the opportunity (6)(occasion) to improve my english. I had only past (7) one week in england.
This summer, for jullyin July, I am going to work at a community centre in giberville, as many summers(8). Maybe in august i should (10) go in (9) Italia with my family but it’s not sure.

(1) On dit: If all goes well
(2) Pas le bon verbe
(3) Cette phrase n'a pas de sens; à refaire
(4) Forme interrogative ne convient pas et la phrase ne veut rien dire
(5) sujet manquant; I want to work
(6) On dit: it would be an opportunity
(7) à revoir la traduction du verbe passer dans le contexte
(8) as I have for many summers
(9) mauvaise préposition
(10) should dans le contexte veut dire: Il faut que.../Je dois ...; On peut dire: I may go to Italy with my family in August but it's not for sure.

Cordialement



Réponse: Correction /oral fac de rom27, postée le 10-05-2011 à 23:10:14 (S | E)
Hello,

Merci beaucoup pour cette correction, je vous avais bien dit qu'il risquait d'y avoir beaucoup de fautes!
La mauvaise nouvelle c'est que cette correction arrive trop tard.
La bonne nouvelle c'est que je vais sûrement aller au rattrapage et du coup elle va sûrement me servir (je vais avoir le temps de l'apprendre bien par coeur et de travailler la prononciation!)

Encore merci en tout cas!

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 11-05-2011 07:51




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