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Correction lettre anglais (1)

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction lettre anglais
Message de beatdown posté le 24-09-2011 à 15:09:11
Bonjour
Je cherche de l'aide pour corriger une lettre que j'envoie à ma famille d'accueil aux Philippines pour un voyage d'un an.
Si quelqu'un pouvait m'aider à fignoler tout ça , ça serait sympa! merci

Dear Host Family,

I'm on 12th grader in « Lycée ... » in ... , in science and technique of the management (STG) marketing speciality. I am actually preparing my “baccalauréat”, which is the equivalent of your higher secondary certificate. After I receive my “baccalauréat”, I would spend an associate degree called “... “to work in tourism, but I don’t know still exactly which job.
During a typical day, I go to high school, located unless a kilometre from my house, by foot. The ride is very short. Then, I arrive at school where I greet my friends .I have a timetable of 31 hours a week (Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Wednesday morning). The evening, when I return at home, I do my homework on the computer.

If I had to definite myself in a few words, I would say that I'm very curious, brave and opened to the others as well as to the new experiences. My families and my friends, them, describe me as somebody of independent, respectful, reliable, liking the change and the travels.
I'm thinking be friendly and I reached easily to communicate with people whom I do not know.

My principal center of interest is music, I practise the drums and I love go has numerous concerts, more or less far from to me. I also like participate in a local holiday called "..." which takes place in winter, in a city near to me. During my years at the high school, due to a lack of time, I practise no more sport in club, but before I have practised the handball for 4 years
I take advantage many of my spare time to see my friends and go out, go to some concerts ,… I also go on internet to communicate with my friends and to organize my exits
I 'm very interested in Asian countries since I am young .I was always enticed by these countries, because the differences between these countries and mine are very numerous.
Concerning the things I don’t like, I think I can adapt at all the situations I’m faced. I don’t have any allergy or dietary restrictions, so I eat of everything, I am difficult in no way concerning the food. As for animals, I like them a lot ( I have a dog ) and I have no allergy.

I have made some travels abroad, In Tunisia , in Morocco, in Chypre , and in countries close to mine as England, Belgium, Germany... In the middle school I made a journey in Spain of one week or we were in host family, what I have a lot appreciates contrary to the other persons, who would have preferred to be in a hotel.
My objectives concerning this year with "..." are, first of all, to discover a new country and its culture, very different of mine. As I said it, I’m a very inquisitive person, and I love “changing of scenery”, so I can’t wait for discovering your customs and your way of life. The second objective is one about the language. I hope be back in France after having mastered the language of the country, and I intend to conserve the acquired knowledge and put what I know now to practical use if I work in tourism. Honestly, I think that this year abroad will be an extraordinary experience for me, and I’ll be very happy to share it with your family.
Looking forward to seeing you soon
Best Regards,

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 24-09-2011 15:34
Traduction automatique refusée; topic fermé


Réponse: Correction lettre anglais de headway, postée le 24-09-2011 à 15:21:34
Bonjour,

Il vaudrait mieux que vous postiez un travail plus personnel, non sorti d'un traducteur automatique.

Cordialement.

Headway.


Réponse: Correction lettre anglais de gerondif, postée le 24-09-2011 à 15:33:30
Bonjour,

les traducteurs automatiques ont deux défauts entre autres:

1) si votre texte n'est pas correctement orthographié, il se "plante" encore plus:
"J'aime aller a de nombreux concerts" sans accent sur le à donne:
I love go has numerous concerts.
avec un beau verbe avoir.

2 il ne choisit pas logiquement le bon sens du verbe "passer" un examen (to take an exam) et choisit "passer du temps"(to spend). De plus, vous avez dû écrire: "je passerais"(conditionnel) au lieu de "je passerai"(futur)

I would spend an associate degree.

Les destinataires de cette lettre vont penser que vous vous moquez d'eux.




Réponse: Correction lettre anglais de sherry48, postée le 24-09-2011 à 16:06:50
Hello beatdown. A beginning-different word/form, place, a word missing
I'm on 12th grader in « Lycée ... » in ... , in science and technique of the management (STG) marketing speciality. I am actually preparing my “baccalauréat”, which is the equivalent of your higher secondary certificate. After I receive my “baccalauréat”, I would spend an associate degree called “... “to work in tourism, but I don’t know still exactly which job.
During a typical day, I go to high school, located unless a kilometre from my house, by foot. The ride is very short. Then, I arrive at school where I greet my friends .I have a timetable of 31 hours a week (Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Wednesday morning). The evening, when I return at home, I do my homework on the computer.

If I had to definite myself in a few words, I would say that I'm very curious, brave and opened to the others as well as to the new experiences. My families and my friends, them, describe me as somebody of independent, respectful, reliable, liking the change and the travels.
I'm thinking be friendly and I reached easily to communicate with people whom I do not know.

My principal center of interest is music, I practise the drums and I love go has numerous concerts, more or less far from to me. I also like participate in a local holiday called "..." which takes place in winter, in a city near to me. During my years at the high school, due to a lack of time, I practise no more sport in club, but before I have practised the handball for 4 years
I take advantage many of my spare time to see my friends and go out, go to some concerts ,… I also go on internet to communicate with my friends and to organize my exits
I 'm very interested in Asian countries since I am young .I was always enticed by these countries, because the differences between these countries and mine are very numerous.
Concerning the things I don’t like, I think I can adapt at all the situations I’m faced. I don’t have any allergy or dietary restrictions, so I eat of everything, I am difficult in no way concerning the food. As for animals, I like them a lot ( I have a dog ) and I have no allergy.

I have made some travels abroad, In Tunisia , in Morocco, in Chypre (in English), and in countries close to mine as England, Belgium, Germany... In the middle school I made a journey in Spain of one week or we were in host family, what I have a lot appreciates contrary to the other persons, who would have preferred to be in a hotel.
My objectives concerning this year with "..." are, first of all, to discover a new country and its culture, very different of mine. As I said it, I’m a very inquisitive person, and I love "changing of scenery”, so I can’t wait for discovering your customs and your way of life. The second objective.. Sherry




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