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Rédaction/ lettre

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Rédaction/ lettre
Message de tsape01 posté le 01-02-2012 à 15:31:59 (S | E | F)
Bonsoir à tous,

J’aimerais dans un premier temps dire que je n’utilise jamais des « outils de traduction » pour faire des devoirs que je posterais sur ce site ou pour faire un devoir quelconque car cela est un danger pour mon apprentissage linguistique.
Deuxièmement dans mon devoir posté précédemment sur le « Forum », j’ai voulu utiliser de nouveaux termes, construire des phrases un peu différentes.
J’ai refait le devoir comme recommandé et j’aimerais s’il vous plait que vous me corrigiez.

Dear Stephan,
I’m so happy to write you. It’s ages since I haven’t written you.
How are you?
I write this message because I want to tell you that Olivier our little brother decided not to go to school. He would rather make a vocational training to become an engineer. He does not know how to tell the parents. That is why he asks me to give him advice. But before giving him advice, I would like to know what you think. As far as I’m concerned, I do not agree. I think he should first pass the baccalaureate then he will do what he wants. I think with baccalaureate he could easily enter into any professional school. For example: Polytechnique. We always ask to have at least a baccalaureate when you want even to study abroad and you will also be well paid wherever you will work. Furthermore our parents have always wanted that we first pass baccalaureate because it’s the front- door in the world of work, in the working life. Its means you’re ready to enter to the working life. For example: to go to the university, because when you go to the university, you are obliged to be independent in spite of that you have sisters or brothers or parents.
And it’s not even sure that as soon as he would become engineer he would find directly a job. I think that our parents certainly will not agree. He even has the chance that you and I are already working and we are able to pay for his studies. So money isn’t a problem. If he wants he can even go to study abroad after his baccalaureate.
What do you think?
Please, reply soon.
Your sister Fideline

Merci d'avance vos réponses.
tsape01

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 01-02-2012 15:58


Réponse: Rédaction/ lettre de notrepere, postée le 02-02-2012 à 04:06:05 (S | E)
Bonjour

Dear Stephan,
I’m so happy to write you. It’s ages since I haven’t written you.
How are you?
I write( T) this message because I want to tell you that Olivier, our little brother, decided not to go to school. He would rather make( V) a vocational training to become an engineer. He does not know how to tell the( V) parents. That is why he asks ( T) me to give him advice. But before giving him advice, I would like to know what you think. As far as I’m concerned, I do not agree. I think he should first pass the baccalaureate then he will( V) do what he wants. I think with the baccalaureate he could easily enter into any professional school. For example: Polytechnique. We always ask to have at least a baccalaureate when you want even to study abroad and you will also be well paid wherever you will work. Furthermore our parents have always wanted that we( comme objet) first to pass the baccalaureate because it’s the front- door in the world of work(cette expression ne va pas), in the working life. Its means you’re ready to enter to the working life. For example: to go to the university, because when you go to the university, you are obliged to be independent in spite of that you have( gérondif) sisters or brothers or parents.
And it’s not even sure certain that as soon as he would become( T) an engineer he would find directly a job (ordre des mots). I think that our parents certainly will not agree. He even has the chance that you and I are already working and we are able to pay for his studies. So money isn’t a problem. If he wants he can even go (to) study abroad after his baccalaureate.
What do you think?
Please, reply soon.
Your sister Fideline

T = faute de temps
V = vocabulaire à revoir
en rouge = inutile/erreur
en vert = correction donnée




Réponse: Rédaction/ lettre de tsape01, postée le 02-02-2012 à 23:44:16 (S | E)
Bonsoir! Un grand merci à notrepere pour sa correction.
Voici mon texte refait.
Il y a quelques questions que j’ai posées dans mon texte.

Dear Stephan,
I’m so happy to write you. It has been a long time that I have written to you.
How are you?
I’m writing this message because I want to tell you that Olivier, our little brother, decided not to go to school. He would rather do a vocational training to become an engineer. He does not know how to tell our parents. That is why he asked me to give him advice. But before giving him advice, I would like to know what you think. As far as I’m concerned, I do not agree. I think he should first pass the G.C.E.A-levels then he can do what he wants. I think with the G.C.E.A-levels he could easily enter into any professional school. For example: Polytechnique (I’m not understanding. What is the problem here? In Cameroon Polytechnique is a professional school which forms the young students.). It’s always advice to have at least G.C.E.A-levels when you want to study even abroad and you will also be well paid wherever you will (Why do you remove “WILL”? We speak here in the future. Is it wrong?) work. Furthermore our parents have always wanted us to first pass the G.C.E.A-levels because it’s the front- door to the world of work (Is it wrong now?), in the working life. It means you’re ready to enter in the working life. For example: to go to the university, because when you go to the university, you are obliged to be independent in spite of your relative.
And it’s not even certain that as soon as he will become an engineer he would directly find a job. I think that our parents certainly will not agree. He is lucky you and I are already working and we are able to pay for his studies. So money isn’t a problem. If he wants he can even go (to) study abroad after his G.C.E.A-levels.
What do you think?
Please, reply soon.
Your sister Fideline

tsape01



Réponse: Rédaction/ lettre de gerondif, postée le 03-02-2012 à 18:59:19 (S | E)
Hello,

Dear Stephan,
I’m so happy to write (préposition) you. It has been a long time that(mauvaise conjonction) I have written (avec depuis, ce temps changera)to you.
How are you?
I’m writing this message because I want to tell you that Olivier, our little brother, decided not to go to school. He would rather do a vocational training to become an engineer. He does not know how to tell our parents. That is why he asked me to give him advice. But before giving him advice, I would like to know what you think. As far as I’m concerned, I do not agree. I think he should first pass(au sens de réussir) the G.C.E.A-levels then he can do what he wants(what he likes). I think with the G.C.E.A-levels he could easily enter into(enter est transitif direct) any professional school. For example: Polytechnique (I’m not understanding(mauvais temps). What is the problem here? In Cameroon Polytechnique is a professional school which forms the young students.). It’s always advice to have at least G.C.E.A-levels when you want to study even abroad and you will also be well paid wherever you will (Why do you remove “WILL”? We speak here in the future. Is it wrong?yes) work. Furthermore our parents have always wanted us to first pass(au sens de réussir, passer un examen, c'est to take an exam) the G.C.E.A-levels because it’s the front- door to the world of work (ne se dit pas)(Is it wrong now? yes), in the working life. It means you’re ready to enter in the working life. For example: to go to the university, because when you go to the university, you are obliged to (il y a des structures moins françaises)be independent in spite of your relative(sens? malgré ton parent?).
And it’s not even certain that as soon as he will become an engineer he would directly find a job. I think that our parents certainly will not agree. He is lucky you and I are already working and we are able to pay for his studies. So money isn’t a problem. If he wants he can even go (to)and study abroad after his G.C.E.A-levels.
What do you think?
Please, reply soon.
Your sister Fideline





Réponse: Rédaction/ lettre de tsape01, postée le 04-02-2012 à 05:13:05 (S | E)
Bonjour,
juste pour dire un grand merci à gerondif pour sa correction.
tsape01




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