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Correction/ crise européenne

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction/ crise européenne
Message de lyly1962 posté le 28-05-2012 à 18:21:40 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,

Merci de bien vouloir m'aider à corriger ma rédaction s'il vous plaît. C'était un thème difficile sur la crise européenne alors j'ai fait de mon mieux. Pouvez-vous me dire ce que vous pensez.
Merci pour votre aide.

Voici mon texte :
I am going to explain what I think about the European crisis problem in general.

In July 2013, with the entrance of Croatia, Europe will count 28 members and, in my opinion, there are very too many countries in the European Union. I think that, on the one hand you say unity is strength but on the other hand too many countries weaken it. In 2003, when there were only 12 members, the politicians had already difficulties in understanding. And so now with 28 countries, it is really an impossible dream.

In 2002, Euro was a strong currency and you should make everything so that it stays but instead of that it undergoes a growing devaluation. There are 17 countries in the Eurozone and I would find natural that if a country had financial problems that it should go out of the Eurozone. Obviously that would not be without any trouble because return to the ancient currency cannot be made without problem. The basic problem would be the conversion of all the prices towards the national currency.

If you help member states in deficit that leaves a door opened to abuses. Greece, Ireland and now Spain need help. It is too easy, a country is badly managed, has mountains of debts and it is the other countries which should help them. In my mind, I think that it is not natural. It is as a bottomless pit.

In conclusion, I think that Europe has to learn from gaps and that it's high time to take draconian measures. In my opinion, it is necessary to reduce the number of countries in the Eurozone. I think that one of the solutions could be that countries in difficulties return to their ancient currencies.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 28-05-2012 18:54



Réponse: Correction/ crise européenne de gerondif, postée le 28-05-2012 à 18:38:51 (S | E)
Bonsoir,
I am going to explain what I think about the European crisis problem in general.

In July 2013, with the entrance of Croatia, Europe will count 28 members and, in my opinion, there are very(very au sens de très ne va pas, pensez à far) too many countries in the European Union. I think that, on the one hand you say unity is strength but on the other hand too many countries weaken it. In 2003, when there were only 12 members, the politicians had already difficulties in understanding. And so now with 28 countries, it is really an impossible dream.

In 2002, Euro was a strong currency and you should make(make or do ?) everything so that it stays so but instead of that it undergoes a growing devaluation. There are 17 countries in the Eurozone and I would find natural that if a country had financial problems that(est en trop, mettez une virgule à la place) it should go out of the Eurozone. Obviously that would not be without any(me semble inutile, par contre , without troubles au pluriel irait bien) trouble because return (gérondif, forme en ing)to the ancient currency cannot be made without problem(pluriel?). The basic problem would be the conversion of all the prices towards(into?) the national currency.

If you help member states in deficit,(virgule) that leaves a door opened to abuses. Greece, Ireland and now Spain need help. It is too easy, a country is badly managed, has mountains of debts and it is the other countries which(structure française, c'est aux autres de....à) should help them. In my mind, I think that it is not natural. It is as(as ou like??) a bottomless pit.

In conclusion, I think that Europe has to learn from gaps(dans quel sens?) and that it's high time(me semble être suivi d'un subjonctif semblable au prétérit: It's high time he were arrested, it's high time they took measures...) to take draconian measures. In my opinion, it is necessary to reduce the number of countries in the Eurozone. I think that one of the solutions could be that countries in difficulties return to their ancient (former) currencies.





Réponse: Correction/ crise européenne de lyly1962, postée le 28-05-2012 à 22:17:26 (S | E)
Bonjour et merci pour vos suggestions ... J'ai mis "gaps" dans le sens "des lacunes"
J'espère que j'ai bien compris vos suggestions ... merci encore et bonne soirée,

Lilly

j'ai corrigé mon texte et voilà ce que ça donne :

I am going to explain what I think about the European crisis problem in general.

In July 2013, with the entrance of Croatia, Europe will count 28 members and, in my opinion, there are too many countries in the European Union. I think that, on the one hand you say unity is strength but on the other hand too many countries weaken it. In 2003, when there were only 12 members, the politicians had already difficulties in understanding. And so now with 28 countries, it is really an impossible dream.

In 2002, Euro was a strong currency and you should do everything so that it stays so but instead of that it undergoes a growing devaluation. There are 17 countries in the Eurozone and I would find natural that if a country had financial problem, it should go out of the Eurozone. Obviously that would not be without troubles because returning to the ancient currency cannot be made without problems. The basic problem would be the conversion of all the prices into the national currency.

If you help member states in deficit, that leaves a door opened to abuses. Greece, Ireland and now Spain need help. It is too easy, a country is badly managed, has mountains of debts and it is the other countries that should help them. In my mind, I think that it is not natural. It is like a bottomless pit.

In conclusion, I think that Europe has to learn from gaps and that it's high time they took draconian measures. In my opinion, it is necessary to reduce the number of countries in the Eurozone. I think that one of the solutions could be that countries in difficulties return to their former currencies.




Réponse: Correction/ crise européenne de gerondif, postée le 28-05-2012 à 22:39:57 (S | E)
Bonsoir,
It is too easy, a country is badly managed, has mountains of debts and it is the other countries that should help them.

Cette phrase pourrait être mieux construite et l'idée que vous défendez mise en valeur:

I think it is too easy if, whenever (à chaque fois que) a country is badly managed and has mountains of debts, the other countries have to help them.

gaps me paraît bizarre, je ne lui vois qu'un sens géographique ou temporel.



Réponse: Correction/ crise européenne de lyly1962, postée le 29-05-2012 à 09:08:48 (S | E)
Bonjour,

Très judicieux votre conseil pour mettre en valeur mon opinion :o)
A la place de 'gaps' ne pourrait-on mettre 'mistakes' ce qui donnerait :

In conclusion, I think that Europe has to learn from its mistakes and that it's high time they took draconian measures.

Merci beaucoup pour votre patience et votre précieuse aide
très bonne journée,

Lilly




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