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Correction /oral bac

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction /oral bac
Message de cecanada posté le 19-04-2013 à 10:31:00 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je prépare l'oral d'anglais pour le Bac, pourriez-vous corriger mes fautes s'il vous plait ?
Merci d'avance ;)


The folder that I will present is the notion « Places and forms of power », I will comment with the following problem : …... In fact since anytime, minorities were placed at the gap and charged for no reason. First we will see witches in the 17th century in America, then well study « witch hunting » in the 20 th century, and to finish we will speak about scapegoating.

During the 17th century, in America, may people were accused of witchraft. This belief haunted the minds of most people. Puritanism was a religion i the 17th century New England. The puritans had very strict moral codes. They believed that women were by nature more tempted by the devil than men, to them they were more prone to sinful impulses. Witches were embittened old mumbling women with stesped backs and agitated trembling members. The truth is that woman who had the misfortune boresemble that description could be automatically cabeled as witches, while they were only poor old widows who could not afford to live other wise.
Also in the 17th century with hunting was omnipresent, for example during the trial of salem, 200 people were accused of witchraft and 20 were hanged.
Witch hunting can be explained by popular belief and epidemics famines, illnesses,..unexplained . People attributed all mysterious things to the devil and women were ideal vistims to explain all the tragedy of the world.

As to the 17th century, we found the notion of « witch hunting » in the 20th century in America. In fact in these days, a politicy against communism was putin place. The FBI had the responsibility to arrest communist Americans. It was known under the name of « witch hunting ». the FBI used different strategies to force people to give communist names. They tried to subdue citizens and manipulate them before using blackmail. By giving the FBI information they could be cleaned from all suspicion. On the contrary, if they didn't cooperete they were considered guilty. So many people were accused without real reasons to be witches in the 20th century.

Even if today witch hunting doesn't really exist, numerous people are still rejected and excluded, without real reason. Especially small community in some countries, as in America : afler the attack un « pearl harbor », the japaneses community living in the states was suspected of wanting to help the enemy, and they feared being the tragets of retaliation. So they were the victims of american prejudice and hatned. They were scapegoats.

As a conclusion, we can say that witch hunting began long ago, but today doesn't really exist such as it was before, but it didn't disappear, it evolued and continued in other forms, for example when the japanes became scapegoats.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 19-04-2013 12:33


Réponse: Correction /oral bac de cecanada, postée le 26-04-2013 à 14:38:49 (S | E)
Une petite aide pliz ?
Merci ;)



Réponse: Correction /oral bac de lolly123, postée le 26-04-2013 à 15:40:47 (S | E)
Hello cecanada, I am a bit younger than you, but maybe I can give you some advicies to help you!


The folder that I will present is the notion « Places and forms of power », I will comment with the following problem :... In fact since anytime, [You mean "for a long time", don't you? I think that this locution could be more appropriate] minorities were placed at the gap and charged for no reason. First we will see witches in the 17th century in America, then well [It is "we will", isn't it?] study « witch hunting » in the 20 th century, and to finish ["and finally" could be better] we will speak about scapegoating.

During the 17th century, in America, may ["many", maybe you have made a mistake while you were writing] people were accused of witchraft ["witchcraft", you just forgot the "c"]. This belief haunted the minds of most ["many" sounds better I think] people. Puritanism was a religion in the 17th century in New England. The puritans had very strict moral codes. They believed that women were by nature more tempted by the devil than men, to them they were more prone to sinful impulses. Witches were embittened old mumbling women with stesped backs and agitated trembling members. The truth is that woman who had the misfortune [to] boresemble [what does "boresemble" means?? I guess you meant "resemble" or "look like"] that description could be automatically cabeled ["cabled" maybe?] as witches, while they were only poor old widows who could not afford to live other wise.
Also in the 17th century with hunting was omnipresent, for example during the trial of salem, 200 people were accused of witchraft and 20 were hanged.
Witch hunting can be explained by popular belief and epidemics famines, illnesses,..unexplained . People attributed all mysterious things to the devil and women were ideal victims to explain all the tragedy of the world.

As to the 17th century, we found the notion of « witch hunting » in the 20th century in America. In fact in these days, a politicy against communism was put in place. The FBI had the responsibility to arrest communist Americans. It was known under the name of « witch hunting ». the FBI used different strategies to force people to give communist names. They tried to subdue citizens and manipulate them before using blackmail. By giving the FBI information they could be cleaned from all suspicion. On the contrary, if they didn't cooperete [it is "cooperate"] they were considered guilty. So many people were accused without real reasons to be witches in the 20th century.

Even if today witch hunting doesn't really exist, numerous people are still rejected and excluded, without real reason. Especially small community in some countries, as in America : afler the attack on « pearl harbor », the japaneses community ["japanese communities" is maybe what you mean] living in the states was suspected of wanting to help the enemy, and they feared being the tragets of retaliation. So they were the victims of american prejudice and hatned. They were scapegoats.

As a conclusion, we can say that witch hunting began long ago ["a long time ago" could be more appropriate], but today doesn't really exist such as it was before, but it didn't disappear, it evolued and continued in other forms, for example when the japanes became scapegoats.



Réponse: Correction /oral bac de brettdallen, postée le 26-04-2013 à 15:42:52 (S | E)
Bonjour,

Je ne corrigerai pas votre présentation mais vous rappelerai que vous devez mentionner un certain nombre de documents étudiés en classe concernant chacune des notions. Ainsi, vous devez décrire les documents en question, parler de leur contenu et essayer d'expliquer en quoi ils sont pertinents, en quoi ils illustrent la notion étudiée.

Cordialement.




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