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Oral/Myths and heroes

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Oral/Myths and heroes
Message de alinelac posté le 10-05-2014 à 15:45:52 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je passe mon bac d'anglais lundi et je voudrais savoir s'il y a beaucoup de fautes dans ce que j'ai écrit s'il vous plaît.
Merci pour vos réponses.


I am going to talk about the notion of myth and heroes. We can give a definition of this notion. A hero is a person or inhuman who represent a symbol for tne population and become the icon. A myth is an event or a story whose can real or not real. What is a person considered same a hero ?
To illustrate the notion we can take differents examples of personalities who became the models of society, same Marc Zuckerberge or Edison, or still Steve Jobs and of other one. Furethermore, ther are those who worked hard to manage to the top to being start from scratch. But there are also other who became national hero with their policy and they changed the policy of their country. Documents I have chosen are a extract of web site of Oprah Winfrey, a poem about the life of Andrew Carnegie,

When we look the career of Oprah Winfrey, she grown up in Kosciusko, Mississipi with obstacles known by an Africain americain. She may have suffered from discrimination such as racial prejudices. But she begins the career same correspondent on WTVF-TV, then anchorwoman in Chicago. Today she direct her own show whose name The Oprah Winfrey Show since 1985 whose has an international impact (144 countries). We can say this career is extraordinary.
She started from scratch before achieve success. She became the most influencial woman of America. We can say she was very important in the america society.

As Oprah Winfrey, Andrew Carnegie who was a Scottish immigrant in the USA, became the richest man in the world. He was nickname “prince of peace” because donated money for the education. He was determined, ambitious and confident in the americain dream. These qualities are the one of a hero. Even if the image of Scottish who is stingy, he was even though a philantropist but he was generous.
He became very famous at the time, had human values very important as pronoted peace in the world. He embodies the myth of the self-made man.

This differents personalities are a good example of Americain dreams.

We can take as example Nelson Mandela to illustrate this notion because he represented the policy of today of South Africa. During her life, he fought against the racism. He served as his country, a country of division. He became a national hero with her policy whose changed the vision of people. He's been through a lot of obstacles during his life. He incarcerated during 27 years, persecuted by white people. He embodies the liberty of black's population.

As Nelson Mandela, Barck Obama changed the situation on afghanistan to do peace on the world. And he was a symbol of defender of black's right and of a close country. He is the first black's president of the USA. He avoided doing a war furthermore.
A hero can be a normal person with a good means to improve some situation.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 10-05-2014 17:48


Réponse: Oral/Myths and heroes de laure95, postée le 10-05-2014 à 17:38:09 (S | E)
Bonjour,
Voici des points à reprendre:
I am going to talk about the notion of myth and heroes. We can give a definition of this notion. A hero is a person or inhuman (a human?)who represent (conjugaison:3è pers du sing) a symbol for tne population and become (même remarque) the icon. A myth is an event or a story whose (whose = à qui et non "qui") can (il manque un verbe) real or not real. What is a person considered same a hero ? (je ne comprends pas le sens de ta question mal formulée)
To illustrate the notion we can take differents (un adjectif ne s'accorde pas) examples of personalities who became the models of society, same ? Marc Zuckerberge or Edison, or still Steve Jobs and of other one ?. Furethermore (orthographe), ther (même remarque) are those who worked hard to manage to the top to being (TO + BASE VERBALE) start from scratch. But there are also other (pluriel) who became national hero (pluriel) with their policy (pluriel) and they changed the policy of their country. (the) Documents I have chosen are a extract (extracted) of (pas la bonne préposition) web site of Oprah Winfrey, a poem about the life of Andrew Carnegie,

When we look (at) the career of Oprah Winfrey, she grown (ce n'est pas le preterit) up in Kosciusko, Mississipi with obstacles known by an Africain américain (c'est du français). She may have suffered from discrimination such as racial prejudices. But she begins (preterit) the (mettre un possessif) career same ? correspondent on WTVF-TV, then (an) anchorwoman in Chicago. Today she direct (conjugaison) her own show whose name (il manque un verbe)The Oprah Winfrey Show since 1985 whose has an international impact (144 countries). We can say this career is extraordinary.
She started from scratch before achieve (à mettre au gérondif) success. She became the most influencial woman of America. We can say she was very important in the america (mettre l'adjectif) society.

As Oprah Winfrey, Andrew Carnegie who was a Scottish immigrant in the USA, became the richest man in the world. He was nickname (mal dit)“prince of peace” because (où est le sujet?)donated money for the education. He was determined, ambitious and confident in the americain (c'est du français) dream. These qualities are the one of a hero. Even if the image of Scottish who is stingy (mal dit), he was even though a philantropist but he was generous.
He became very famous at the time, had human values very important (pas à la bonne place) as pronoted (orthographe) peace in the world. He embodies the myth of the self-made man.

This (au pluriel) differents (les adjectifs sont invariables) personalities are a good example of Americain dreams (à mettre au singulier).

We can take as example Nelson Mandela to illustrate this notion because he represented the policy of today of South Africa. During her (pas le bon possessif) life, he fought against the racism. He served as his country, a country of division. He became a national hero with her policy whose changed the vision of people. He's been through a lot of obstacles during his life. He (was)incarcerated during 27 years, persecuted by white people. He embodies the liberty of black's (au singulier) population.

As Nelson Mandela, Barck Obama changed the situation on afghanistan to do(mettre un verbe plus précis) peace on (pas la bonne préposition)the world. And he was a symbol of (the) defender of black's right (à mettre au pluriel) and of a close country. He is the first black's president of the USA. He avoided doing a war furthermore.
A hero can be a normal person with a good means to improve some situation.



Réponse: Oral/Myths and heroes de alinelac, postée le 11-05-2014 à 19:32:52 (S | E)
merci vous me sauvez la vie !!!!




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