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Bac/Places and forms of power

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Bac/Places and forms of power
Message de kirikou posté le 26-05-2017 à 16:27:40 (S | E | F)
Bonjour ,
je passe mon oral d'anglais dans quelques jours et j'aimerais que l'on corrige mes fautes pour mon texte sur la notion places and forms of power, le texte parle du pouvoir de la musique.
Merci d'avance pour vos réponses.

I’m going to talk about the notion places and forms of power through the power of music. First of all I would like to give a definition of this notion: we can define the forms of power as an exercise which has an influence on the life, people, or the health... In order to illustrate this notion I will try to answer the question: How the music can have an influence on the health.

My presentation is made up of two main parts one the one hand The effect of the music on the mood, one thi other hand the effect on the health.
First the music has a positive effects on the mood for example one of the effects of music is that it can make you feel different, but fifteen seconds of music can change the way you judge the emotions on other people's faces as well. In other words people projected the mood of the music they were listening to onto people’s faces. In the same idea Music plays on our humor because when we listen to the sad music we are sad and when we listen to the joyful music we are joyful o, maybe the effects of music really are in our genes.

That's why we can think, the music has an effect on the health. She was widely used in medical science. Overall music does have positive effects on pain management. According to the newspaper music can help reduce the sensation of chronic pain Until twenty one percent. Music stimulates skills particular as memory, lainguage, attention...

To conclud, we can say that the music has multiple effects in particular on the health. For me the music is really beneficial for various reasons and is essential.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 26-05-2017 19:02



Réponse : Bac/Places and forms of power de laure95, postée le 28-05-2017 à 10:58:39 (S | E)
Bonjour,
- we can define the forms of power as an exercise: ?
- How the music (pas de the et music n'est pas à la bonne place)can have an influence on the health. (point d'interrrogarion)

- The effect of the (pas de the) music on the mood,
- one thi other hand: ?
- First the (pas de the)music has a (pas de a)positive effects
- you judge the (pas de the)emotions
- In (pas la bonne préposition)other words
- people projected the mood of the music they were listening to onto people’s faces: mettre les verbes au présent.
- we listen to the (pas de the) sad music we are sad and when we listen to the (pas de the)joyful music
- o,
- maybe the effects of music really (really n'est pas à la bonne place) are in our genes.

il manque des exemples, voire des références à des documents. C'est trop théorique.

That's why we can think, the music has an effect on the health: pas de the.
- She (pas le bon pronom) was widely used in medical science.
- According to the newspaper (lequel?) music can help (to) reduce the sensation of chronic pain
- Music stimulates skills particular(ly)as (like pas as)memory, lainguage

- conclud,
- we can say that the (pas de the)music has multiple effects in particular on the (pas de the) health. For me the (pas de the) music is really beneficial for various reasons (lesquelles?)



Réponse : Bac/Places and forms of power de kirikou, postée le 28-05-2017 à 14:14:21 (S | E)
Bonjour, merci de votre aide voici ma correction, est ce que c'est mieux comme cela ? Merci

I’m going to talk about the notion places and forms of power through the power of music. First of all I would like to give a definition of this notion: we can define the forms of power as an authority which has an influence on the life, people, or the health... In order to illustrate this notion I will try to answer the question: How music can have an influence on the health?

My presentation is made up of two main parts. One the one hand, the effect of music on the mood, one the other hand the effect on the health.

First music has positive effects on the mood for example one of the effects of music is that it can make you feel different, but fifteen seconds of music can change the way you judge emotions on other people's faces as well. In other words people project the mood of the music they are listen to onto people’s faces. In the same idea Music plays on our humor because when we listen to sad music we are sad and when we listen to joyful music we are joyful. Maybe the effects of music really are in our genes.

That's why we can think, music has an effect on health. It was widely used in medical science. Overall music does have positive effects on pain management. According to the newspaper “ Journal of Advanced Nursing” music can help to reduce the sensation of chronic pain Until twenty one percent. Music stimulates skills particularly as memory, language, attention...

To conclude, we can say that music has multiple effects in particular on health. For me music is really beneficial for various reasons and is essential, because I like music diversity that it exists, in every situation there is a music which we can listen, it helps us to call back us memories or to feel us good



Réponse : Bac/Places and forms of power de dsmith, postée le 30-05-2017 à 05:10:03 (S | E)
Bonjour kirikou,
Voici quelques suggestions:

I’m going to talk about the notion places and forms of power through the power of music. First of all I would like to give a definition of this notion: we can define the forms of power as an authority which has an influence on the life, people, or the health... In order to illustrate this notion I will try to answer the question: How music can have an influence on the health?
remove "the" in front of health and life

My presentation is made up of two main parts. One the one hand, the effect of music on the mood, one the other hand the effect on the health.
"On the one hand" "on the other hand". Remove the word "the" in front of "mood".

First music has positive effects on the mood for example one of the effects of music is that it can make you feel different, but fifteen seconds of music can change the way you judge emotions on other people's faces as well. In other words people project the mood of the music they are listen (present continuous -ing at the end of listen to onto people’s faces. In the same idea Music plays on our humor because when we listen to sad music we are sad and when we listen to joyful music we are joyful. Maybe the effects of music really are in our genes.

That's why we can think, music has an effect on health. It was widely used in medical science. Overall music does have positive effects on pain management. According to the newspaper “ Journal of Advanced Nursing” music can help to reduce the sensation of chronic pain Until (as much as) twenty one percent. Music stimulates skills particularly as -remove this word memory, language, attention...

To conclude, we can say that music has multiple effects in particular on health. For me music is really beneficial for various reasons and is essential, because I like music diversity that it exists (je ne comprends pas), in every situation there is a form of music which we can listen always listen to...you need to add the word "to", it helps us to call back us -
remove
memories or to feel us - remove good.




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