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Correction/ Concorde

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction/ Concorde
Message de digorie92 posté le 17-11-2018 à 16:21:55 (S | E | F)
Hello à tous ;)
J'ai réalisé le résumé d'un exposé d'un camarade en anglais. Serait-il possible d'avoir votre avis et vos éventuelles corrections sur ce que j'ai pris en notes afin de progresser ?
Merci énormément à vous d'avance ;)

The Concorde is a supersonic transport produced by BAC and Sud Aviation, used between 1976 until 2003 by British Airways and Air France. 20 planes were built in order to delivered transatlantic flights (from London or Paris to Washington or New York and reverse).
Its characteristics were very special. It had a maximum speed over at Mach 2.04 (i.e. 2.160 km/h at cruise altitude), allowing the aircraft to reduce the flight time between London and New York to about three hours. With seating for 92 to 128 passengers, kerosene consumption was about 16L per 100km per passenger (which is huge actually).
Moreover, that speed and amount of technology had a price. The ticket price from London to New York was 8100 euros in 1997: the aircraft was mainly destined for wealthy passengers.
However, July 2000, Air France Flight 4590 crashed on a hotel in Gonesse just after take-off. 113 people were killed. Analysts explained that the crash was caused by a metallic strip that had fallen from another plane that had taken off earlier. This fragment hit the fuel tank, which caused a fuel leak and led to a fire. The crew shut down engines and so the aircraft was unable to gain altitude or speed: the aircraft crashed.
3 years after, it ended its services because of many reasons: first, the maintenance was stopped by Airbus. Plus, the high kerosene consumption was a real problem, and finally, there was a form a scepticism around plane industry after September 11 attacks and Gonesse accident.
But there will always be a nostalgia for this supersonic passenger airliner.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 17-11-2018 19:19


Réponse : Correction/ Concorde de here4u, postée le 17-11-2018 à 22:13:18 (S | E)
Hello!

The Concorde is a supersonic transport produced by BAC and Sud Aviation, used between 1976 until 2003 by British Airways and Air France. 20 planes were built in order to delivered transatlantic flights (from London or Paris to Washington or New York and reverse).
Its characteristics were very special. It had a maximum speed over at Mach 2.04 (i.e. 2.160 km/h at cruise altitude), allowing the aircraft to reduce the flight time between London and New York to about three hours. With seating for 92 to 128 passengers, kerosene consumption was about 16L per 100km per passenger (which is huge actually).
Moreover, that speed and amount of technology had a price. The ticket price from London to New York was 8100 euros in 1997(The € didn't exist at that date!): the aircraft was mainly destined (intended?)for wealthy passengers.
However, IN July 2000, Air France Flight 4590 crashed on a hotel in Gonesse just after take-off. 113 people were killed. Analysts explained that the crash was caused by a metallic strip that had fallen from another plane that had taken off earlier. This fragment hit the fuel tank, which caused a fuel leak and led to a fire. The crew shut down engines and so the aircraft was unable to gain altitude or speed: the aircraft crashed.
3 years after, it(repeat the name here!) ended its services because of many reasons: first, the maintenance was stopped by Airbus. Plus, the high kerosene consumption was a real problem, and finally, there was a form a scepticism around plane industry after the September 11 attacks and the Gonesse accident.
ButYet, there will always be a nostalgia for this supersonic (passenger) airliner.




Réponse : Correction/ Concorde de digorie92, postée le 18-11-2018 à 21:48:05 (S | E)
Merci énormément here4u pour tes corrections,
Voici le nouveau texte :
The Concorde is a supersonic transport produced by BAC and Sud Aviation, used between 1976 until 2003 by British Airways and Air France. 20 planes were built in order to delivered transatlantic flights (from London or Paris to Washington or New York and vice versa).
Its characteristics were very special. It had a maximum speed over Mach 2.04 (i.e. 2.160 km/h at cruise altitude), allowing the aircraft to reduce the flight time between London and New York to about three hours. With seating for 92 to 128 passengers, kerosene consumption was about 16L per 100km per passenger (which is huge).
Moreover, that speed and amount of technology had a price. The ticket price from London to New York was the equivalent of 8100 euros in 1997: the aircraft was mainly intended for wealthy passengers.
However, in July 2000, Air France Flight 4590 crashed on a hotel in Gonesse just after take-off. 113 people were killed. Analysts explained that the crash was caused by a metallic strip that had fallen from another plane that had taken off earlier. This fragment hit the fuel tank, which caused a fuel leak and led to a fire. The crew shut down engines and so the aircraft was unable to gain altitude or speed: the aircraft crashed.
3 years after, The Concorde ended its services because of many reasons: first, the maintenance was stopped by Airbus. Plus, the high kerosene consumption was a real problem, and finally, there was a form a scepticism around plane industry after September 11 attacks and Gonesse accident.
Yet, there will always be a nostalgia for this supersonic airliner.

Je ne sais pas par quel verbe remplacer le "delivered", même en francais je ne sais pas le verbe le plus adapté ? "proposer" ? Merci !




Réponse : Correction/ Concorde de gerold, postée le 19-11-2018 à 13:43:46 (S | E)
Bonjour

On dit "assurer des vols". Je pense que vous avez choisi le bon verbe, mais il n'est pas à la bonne forme.




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